Caring for Your Mental Health During the Holidays: Navigating Holiday Stress, Grief, and Interpersonal Challenges
The end-of-year holiday season is often portrayed as a time of joy, connection, and celebration. Yet, for many, it can be a period filled with increased stress, conflict, or a sense of loneliness and disconnection. When the people and culture around you emphasize festivity and cheer, it can be isolating when your internal experience doesn’t match the surrounding environment.
If you struggle during the holiday season, you are far from alone. In 2023, the American Psychological Association found that 89% of U.S. adults experience holiday stress, with nearly two out of five of those adults turning to negative coping mechanisms.
While this time of year can be challenging, supporting your mental health during the holidays is possible by recognizing your emotional needs and implementing intentional, evidence-informed strategies.
Why Do I Struggle With My Mental Health During the Holidays?
There are a number of reasons the holidays may be difficult. Each person experiences the season in a unique way depending on their culture, traditions, financial circumstances, and family. Maybe you dread heading back to your hometown, or are anxious because money is tight. Maybe it feels like everyone expects the world of you – or maybe you’re the one expecting the world of yourself.
There is no single “correct” way to feel as the end-of-year celebrations approach. But if you struggle with your mental health during the holiday season, you’re not alone. In fact, there is an uptick in requests for therapy each year during the holidays.
Below are several common challenges, along with clinically-informed approaches to managing them.
Loneliness
In a season associated with togetherness, feelings of loneliness can intensify. Shifting relationships, feeling out of sync with friends and family, or spending the holidays in a new city can create a sense of disconnection during a time of year where you may find yourself craving deep connection all the more.
Supportive strategies:
Engage in values-based action. While loneliness often leads to withdrawal, taking gentle action even when motivation is low can interrupt the cycle.
Seek intentional community. Look for local gatherings, seasonal events, or volunteer opportunities like partnering with a food pantry or children’s hospital. Contributing to a cause you believe in can foster meaning and connection.
Acknowledge your experience without judgment. Loneliness is a human experience, not a personal failure.
Family Conflict
Does heading home for the holidays make you feel like you’re right back in high school again? Spending time with family can reactivate old patterns or unresolved emotions, and you may find yourself feeling anxious, especially when boundaries are unclear.
Supportive strategies:
Establish limits. Consider strategically structuring your time in ways that preserve your emotional bandwidth. Build in breaks to do something that brings you joy, plan a shorter visit, or stay in a hotel instead of with family if finances permit.
Practice boundary-setting. Redirect conversations when needed and communicate limits calmly and clearly.
Prepare a coping plan. Identify supportive people, grounding strategies, or exit scripts you can lean on when tensions rise.
Comparison and Social Media Pressures
Comparing your holiday to others’ celebrations can create an unrealistic sense of how your own holiday “should” look — especially when you spend too much time poring over curated images from friends, family, and celebrities on social media. Increased self-criticism or dissatisfaction is natural, but harmful.
Supportive strategies:
Reduce or pause social media use. Limiting exposure can lessen comparison-based stress.
Refocus on internal measures of well-being. Ask: What aligns with my values? What feels meaningful or restorative to me this season?
Reality-check your assumptions. Online content rarely reflects the full complexity of others’ lives. You never know how someone might be struggling behind the screen.
Screen Time and Emotional Well-Being
Increased downtime, travel, or attempts to “escape” stress can lead to elevated screen time during the holidays. While digital tools can support connection, especially if you’re spending the season far away from loved ones, excessive use may worsen mood, sleep, and stress.
Supportive strategies:
Create intentional boundaries with technology. Consider device-free meals, setting app limits, or designating offline hours.
Use technology to foster connection. Prioritize video calls with friends and family, mindfulness apps, or creative tools rather than passive scrolling.
Pay attention to your emotional response. Notice when screen use leaves you feeling more drained, anxious, or disconnected, and adjust accordingly.
Financial Stress
Holiday-related spending — gifts, food, travel, events — can intensify financial strain and contribute to feelings of inadequacy or pressure to meet unrealistic expectations.
Supportive strategies:
Develop a realistic budget. Set clear limits aligned with your financial capacity and stick to them throughout the season.
Explore low-cost alternatives. Handmade gifts, shared experiences, or acts of service can be thoughtful, financially sustainable ways to make the holidays special.
Reset your expectations. Your joy doesn’t have to be determined by material output or comparison. Take the time to intentionally remind yourself of what really matters through mindfulness practices like journaling.
Grief
For individuals experiencing grief — whether through loss of a loved one, a relationship ending, or shattered expectations — the holidays can amplify emotional pain. It’s normal to feel the sting of grief amidst the holidays, and it’s okay if you don’t feel festive or celebratory this year.
Supportive strategies:
Give yourself permission to feel. Grief does not follow a prescribed timeline, and holiday rituals may evoke complex emotions.
Modify traditions if needed. You may choose quieter celebrations, new rituals, or ways to honor the person or season you are grieving.
Seek connection and support. Trusted friends, family, community groups, or a therapist can offer a safe space through the season..
Managing Holiday Stress: Releasing What You Cannot Control
As you navigate what can be a difficult season for many, recognize what is within your control — and what’s not.
You cannot control others’ behaviors, unpredictable circumstances, or outcomes. But you can choose your responses, set boundaries, and act in alignment with your values.
Practice setting intentions without being attached to the outcome. If you stumble and make mistakes along the way, offer yourself grace and self-compassion, then adjust as needed. Progress, not perfection, is the goal.
You’re Not Alone This Holiday Season
If the holiday season feels heavy, overwhelming, or complicated, remember this: you are never alone. There are always people ready to come alongside you with support and care, no matter where you are in your journey. Working with a licensed therapist can help you navigate difficult emotions, develop coping strategies, and strengthen resilience.
At Aspire Psychology, our team of experienced, compassionate therapists is here to help you. We offer in-person and virtual therapy to fit a range of schedules and needs. Whether you are managing grief, family conflict, loneliness, or holiday-related stress, our clinicians are here to support you as you work toward balance and emotional well-being.
If you’re ready to begin, we welcome you to schedule an appointment.
